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“Creamy Peanut Butter”

A lesson on being right and being married!

The other day my hubby and I ventured to the grocery store together. Everything was going well, until we got to the peanut butter aisle. My hubby reached for the “natural” peanut butter, but I insisted that we  get the “creamy” version, since  that’s what we had at the house. He paused for a moment, then proceeded to look at the various labels to figure out what we had in the cupboard. He clearly didn’t believe me.

After a few “exchanges”, and a near exit with NOTHING, he finally gave in and said “I’m almost certain we had natural, but just go ahead and get the creamy peanut butter”. I tossed that tube into the cart so quickly, and dashed off to gather the last few items. I was in my feelings, yet and still I kept it together. 

When we finally got home,  I noticed that my hubby made a very deliberate strut to the cupboard. I rolled my eyes, and started putting the groceries away.  I knew exactly what he was doing! I didn’t pay him any mind, other than what I noticed out of my peripheral. He shuffled through the shelves for a few moments, then slowly closed the cupboard door. (He saw truth. lol!) He stood there for a few seconds, before finally admitting that I was right about the peanut butter.

In that moment, in that VERY REAL moment…

All I could think to say was “I told you so”. I knew I was right. I felt the words welling up within my soul, until I remembered being on the other side. Countless moments of being wrong came to mind, and I knew I needed to humble myself and sprinkle my response with love. (UGHHHH). I finished putting the last few groceries away, turned to the love of my life and said, “No problem babe, you know I’ve been there.  I’m just glad we got the right one”. 

Thank God I passed that test!  

What do you do when your spouse is wrong?  Do you rub it in their face, trying to “make an example” of the situation? OR do you show grace, put yourself in their shoes, and respond in love? Of course the latter is the best option, but let’s be real… it sure isn’t the easiest! Listen,  I don’t always get it right, but let me encourage you (as I encourage myself)! The next time you find yourself in a “creamy peanut butter” situation, and you KNOW you’re right.. respond in love! Nobody is perfect, and the worst thing to do is kick someone when they’ve humbly admitted that they’ve made a mistake. Yes, there will be moments when you need to have a full conversation about certain situations, but don’t give access to the enemy. Proverbs 15:1 says it best, “A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger”. God already knew! Choose your response carefully. Show grace and  fight with every bit of your being to keep the peace in your marriage and your household!  You two are one!

Nobody said it would be easy, but believe me, it will always be worth it!

 

Thou Restraineth* my Lips

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A few nights ago, I asked Keem to pick up some water from the grocery store on his way home from work! Everything was great! We laughed on the phone, and I anxiously waited for him to come home to me <3! When he came through the door, I could tell something was bothering him. I happily greeted him, he kissed my forehead and set the table with the water and our dinner. We sat there in silence, and it was literally causing my pressure to rise. What was the problem? Was it me? What did I do?

I couldn’t take it any longer and as I began to ask him “Baby, what did I do to cause you to be so upset with me”, I could sense the Holy Spirit leading me to be still! In other words, He was letting me know to keep my mouth SHUT! This was a very difficult moment for me (like legit hard), but I managed to obey and I didn’t say a word.

Keem finished his meal, and excused himself from the table.  I made my way to the bathroom to wash my face, and get ready for bed. As the face wash began to lather, Keem began to tell me that they moved everything at the grocery store, and the WATER was moved all the way to the back of the store! He expressed how frustrating it was to be in that store looking all over the place, when he intended to be in and out.  

Can you believe that? Can you believe that his frustration had nothing to do with me?  He wasn’t even mad or upset, he was simply frustrated with a situation for which he need “a moment”.  If I had gone my way, and  asked him “Why are you so upset with me” not only would I have been accusing him of being upset, I would have selfishly made it about me.  The wording of the question, along with my agitated tone (Yes, I was bothered), would have made the whole situation  worse.  

Ladies, if you are married or in a serious relationship, do yourself a favor; take a moment to be silent and pray before you speak (especially during a conflict).  It can literally change the entire tone of your relationship! Before you say what is on your mind, listen to that still voice and see what He is leading you to do. The enemy will do whatever it takes to cause confusion, and division in the lives of God’s people, (he is definitely attacking marriages), so we must be vigilant and heed the voice of the Lord! I know it is not easy! I am LEARNING every single day, and sometimes I get it horribly wrong! But thank God for His faithfulness, and for continuing to help me “restrain my lips”! I encourage you today; be wise, and  allow Him to do the same for you!

-Reese

9 Signs that You have the BEST Bridesmaids Ever!

1. They stand by your side, hold you up, and get down and dirty to handle your light work…And actually have fun while doing it 🙂Douglas James Studios

2. They notice your tears of joy, smile and remind you of how lovely your wedding will be, and that this is just the beginning of an amazing life with your wonderful husband 🙂 Theresa + Arkeem-0070
3. They. Do. This! 
Theresa + Arkeem-0062

4. They keep you calm, cool, collected and remind you of how GORGEOUS you look in your dress! “Don’t hurt ’em, Reese”Theresa + Arkeem-0083
5. They are picture-ready at all times… even when caught off guard <3!Theresa + Arkeem-0167

6. They know when to step in and dry that one tear, before your left eyelash flies off and lands on the minister notes! (too real)Theresa + Arkeem-0144

7. They follow your lead, hold your dress as needed, and DON’T take your bossiness personal (for that one day)Theresa + Arkeem-0229

8. They secretly request #TrapQueen at your reception because they know it brings out your inner ratchet!! :-pTheresa + Arkeem-0389

9. They understand that your wedding  is 100% about you and don’t mind at all!!Theresa + Arkeem-0232

I am so blessed to have had such  wonderful women by my side, who selflessly supported me on my special day! Thank you for the love and sacrifices you all made to be there for me! Love you xxoo 🙂

 

-Stylreesta aka “Mrs. Dennis”

*Photo Cred: All photos captured and edited by  Douglas James Studios