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Feeling “Touched Out” + 3 Ways to Deal With It!

Ladies, how are you all holding up in the midst of the COVID-19 Lockdown? I know some of my moms are quarantined with the baby AND hubby… so this week’s #milennialmomchat is JUST FOR YOU!

This week we’re chatting about what it means to Feel “Touched Out” as a new mom, how it can affect your relationship with your spouse, and 3 practical ways to deal with it!  Intimacy is crazy important, so I’m sharing the real tea of what this looks like and how you can “navigate that space”!

Be Encouraged, and know you are NOT alone!

Be sure to like, comment, SUBSCRIBE and most importantly share with a momma in need!!!

 

Links mentioned:

9 completely Normal Things New Moms Experience: https://youtu.be/E3KCEmpYm8o

What does it mean to feel “touched out”; https://www.romper.com/p/what-does-it-mean-to-feel-touched-out-a-therapist-weighs-in-3196139

Breastfeeding Group for BLACK MOMS (AMAZING): https://www.facebook.com/groups/Blackmomsdobreastfeed/?ref=share

PPD and Anxiety Resources (get the help you need)

* postpartum support international (has info for partners too)

* Postpartumva.org ***specific to VA

* Anxiety and depression association of America

* Talk to your OB or primary care provider... they often have great referrals for therapists local to you or may even have someone on staff for you to speak with.

* Therapy for black girls has a directory of licensed therapists

* Melaninandmentalhealth.com (also has a directory of therapists)

 

 

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Why It took Me a Month to Finish my “Vision Board ” + 3 Takeaways to Help You Slay in 2020!

It took me a little under a month to complete my vision board! Here’s why along with 3 takeaways that will help you SLAY your goals in 2020!

***

1. I had to be Intentional

One of the main themes in my life is to “Be Intentional”.  My first attempt at a vision board years ago, didn’t go so well.  I was a bit all over the place. I literally grabbed a couple of magazines, and started cutting and pasting pretty images with no real vision. To be honest,  I  was more concerned with making sure my board looked good, over making sure I picked images and words that were intentional and spoke directly to who God created me to be/what I wanted to manifest in my life.  I know better now! I took the time to write out exactly what I was expecting God to do in my life, and this time around I found the images and words that aligned with this vision. Not only did I picked the bold, aesthetically appealing images, I chose them with purpose! 

Takeaway: Write the vision, Make it plain… then find the images that are in alignment! Be intentional!

2. I wanted to make sure my goals were Actionable and Measurable.

Another things that was a complete shift this year, I made each goal actionable and measurable (Hello S.M.A.R.T planning). Where I once used to put everything on one big board, I actually used the last few pages of my 2020 planner*. I created what I am going to call vision pages! I broke down my vision for 2020 into 5 specific areas of my life; Faith, Family, Finances, Fitness and Business. And on each of those pages I focused on what I wanted to manifest!  So my “Blog monthly” from 2019, turned into “Post 3x to blog monthly before the last day of that month”. And my very general “Workout” turned into the page you see in the featured image; complete with health and wellness goals and a mindset/affirmation to bring it all together. And Now when I check in at the end of each month, I’m very clear on where I hit the mark, and where I need to adjust! 

Takeaway: Set actionable goals that you can measure! Check in monthly/quarterly, and adjust as needed!

3. I took the time to write out my Prayer requests in the form of praise reports!

This is not a new practice for me, but it is SOOOOO worth sharing! I am a writer (obvi) and for the past few years I’ve been very intentional about writing out specific prayer requests in the form of praise reports**! This started the year before I met my husband! I note this because in January of 2013 I wrote:

“Thank you, Lord for introducing me to my husband. I thank you for making me whole, and allowing me to experience real love from a man who loves and honors you”! 

February 2013, I started dating Keem! 

Now don’t get it twisted this is not a magical formula, nor is this a how to get a husband post. The key is how we frame our requests.  If you look at what I wrote, I understood that I needed to be “whole” and complete in Him, before meeting the one! I took my eyes off of what I wanted and set my intention on what I needed… for God to work on me! Sometimes our prayers are so one sided, we forget to include the work we need to do! (Reference Psalm 37:4)

Framing our requests to God in the form of a declaration and praise is a game changer. Don’t get my wrong, there is totally a place for those broken moments when we lay it all at the feet of Jesus and know that only His strength can carry us. Listen, I have those meltdown moments in the presence of my Savior, too. (Oh, He is The Good Good Father and cares about EVERY SINGLE TEAR)! And I’m so thankful that He also responds to our faith as we declare His word over our lives,  and shows Himself FAITHFUL every single time!

Takeaway: Fuel your prayers with faith. Give God praise in advance for what He is doing/going to manifest in your life, and watch God work out the details!  Move as He directs! Delayed obedience could delay your promise!

 

Reese

Credit:

*Shout out Patrice Washington, who inspired my idea when she mentioned her “Dream Journal”.

** Shout Out to my sister, Chris for this best practice!

 

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My 7 min Delivery | 3 Lessons from My Pregnancy Journey

Yes, you read that correctly! Check out my newest video to find out all the deets about my labor and delivery, along with lessons learned from my pregnancy journey! #NobodybutGod

Enjoy and be encouraged!

Love what you’re seeing?  Don’t want to miss any other posts or videos? Well, be sure to LIKE, COMMENT, SHARE and SUBSCRIBE! Join in for more empowerment tips on how to live your best life; mind, business, & relationships.  And be sure to connect with me on Instagram @Reese__Dennis♥️♥️

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Replay | Fierce 5 💍 LIVE CHAT w/ Lady Shante Baldwin

Hey ladies! In case you missed our final Fierce 5 Live Chat with Lady Shante Baldwin, the replay is posted below!  YASSSSSS!!!! PRESS PLAY and get your entire life🔥🔥🔥! Be sure to like, comment, and share! Super excited for what’s in store next!

 

 

Love what you’re seeing?  Don’t want to miss any other posts or videos? Well, be sure to LIKE, COMMENT, SHARE and SUBSCRIBE! Join in for more empowerment tips on how to live your best life; mind, business, & relationships.  And be sure to connect with me on Instagram @Reese__Dennis♥️♥️

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Week 5 | Fierce 5💍 Marriage Series | Lady Shante Baldwin

fierce 5 lady baldwin

 

It’s week 5 of the Fierce 5💍 Marriage Series, and we’re ending the series with another BOMB feature!! Yaaaasssss! The super fly Lady Shante Baldwin, is dropping gems! Married for 14 years, check out what she has to say about respecting differences, affirming your spouse’s leadership, and how to embrace the “waiting room”.


1. How many years have you been married,

and what has being married for xx years taught you?

 

I have been married for 14 years,  going on 15 in August. As I reflect on the last 14, one of the things it has taught me was to respect our differences. See we are different in many ways, He is an extrovert and I am an introvert. He’s out going and I’m laid back. Over the years I had to learn that our personalities are not the same. We were different in the way we walked, the way we talked, the way we moved etc. This brought on lots of disagreements. I like purple I like blue, it doesn’t take all that, it does take all that lol. Then finally it was an “aha” moment in my marriage where I recognized, I had to master my husband’s personality to understand why he does what he does, and thinks the way he thinks. I was stretched beyond my understanding. During the process, there were many ups and downs, heated fellowships and challenging moments, but love would win every time. Knowing your spouse’s personality is key.  This will bring peace within the marriage and help you to understand your spouse more and more.

2. You are definitely a “woman of purpose” how have you navigated that space of being a help-mate for your husband, and a woman with a purpose/platform/ministry? What challenges have you had to overcome and how?

Navigating through being a helpmate to my Husband and a woman of purpose was challenging at times. At one point, I was working full time, taking care of the household, we had three children and the ministry.  You can imagine lol. I was meeting with women in the ministry, preparing for women fellowships, and so much more. It became challenging and the load was heavy. I was confronted with needing to create balance that would not disrupt my home. I prayed and sought the Lord for wisdom. I knew that I was to be that proverbs 31 women.  Having a true man of God makes all the difference, because we both knew we were called to be a Man and a Women of purpose, we had to come up with something that worked for us. We worked together, shared the tasks at hand, and split the responsibilities. We overcame by understanding each other’s unique identity, talents, calling etc. One of the things that my husband and myself would always say we were “married on purpose”.

3. What word of advice/wisdom do you have for the young wife who is struggling with “submission”?
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The bible tells us to submit to our husbands as unto the Lord. Submission does not mean that a wife is inferior, less intelligent or less competent than her husband. It doesn’t mean that you don’t have a voice or that he is controlling, it’s about trusting your husband to lead the family and aligning your heart with the vision of the marriage. It gives the wife the opportunity to affirm his leadership. As a new wife, you must allow your husband to lead in a way that he submits to the Lord, and you submit to him. It’s nothing wrong with you giving input, asking questions and helping. Submit in a way that he knows that you are his biggest cheerleader and got his back.

4. What about the singles who want to be married, and feel like they’ve been waiting FOREVER? What does it truly mean to “wait on God” as a single woman waiting to be found? Is it just a cliche?

What a great question. Waiting on God is not a cliché at all. I waited!  Ladies be encouraged in the waiting room. It does not mean you sit around and wait for your mate. Waiting on the Lord truly means that you embrace this moment. Use this time to become:

A lady of reckless abandon, unlocking the treasures that are inside of you.

A lady of diligence being diligent with your relationship with the Lord.

A lady of virtue sharing high moral standards, not compromising in any way shape or form, but working on yourself.

Become a woman that is whole and let Him find you serving the Lord, emotionally healthy, and Spiritually sound. When he shows up, you will be ready, set and sound to receive who God has for you.

5. Anything else/advice/wisdom you feel led to share?

Ladies remember that there is not another you! Whatever your position is, whether you are married or single, show up well and Maximize Destiny Now!!!

Lady Shante Baldwin

 

Yasssss to all of the above! Love what you’re reading! Be sure to comment below and let us know your thoughts! We’re going LIVE for another Fierce 5 chat and changing this up a bit! So be sure to connect with me on Facebook so you don’t miss out!

And be sure to connect with me on Instagram, @reese__dennis, for a more wisdom  from the Fierce 5💍 ! Can’t wait to hear from you!

Reese