I recently shared a post reflecting on how things have totally changed over the past 365 days (read that here). I went from being a solo-preneur standing smack dab in the middle of purpose… to birthing a mini boss, and instantly becoming a mommypreneur. LAWD! Talk about TRANSITION. So, Today I’m taking it a bit further and sharing 3 ways I’ve been able to find harmony in my life! Whether you’re a mom of 1 or a mom of 5… a new mom or have been a mom for some time… this post is just for you! Especially if you are navigating that space of building an empire! Read with an open heart and Be encouraged!
1. First things first.
I’m not sure how you prioritize your life, but this year I’ve been extremely intentional about mine:
2. Family/home (Dream and Keem)
With my priorities in check, I’m able to better manage how I make business decisions. If a business decisions or commitment doesn’t align with what God has spoken over my life, or pulls me away from my family… it makes it easy to say “not this time”. I think may of us as moms don’t have our priorities straight. We say, “Family first”, but our decisions say the EXACT opposite. The first step to finding and maintaining harmony in your life as a mom on a mission is to keep your commitments in alignment with your priorities and values! Ask:
-What’s most important to you?
-How can you better prioritize your life, keeping first things first?
“Harmony is achieved only after you’ve identified what’s most important and prioritize accordingly”.
2. Pray & plan ahead. Pivot as needed!
There are certain things that I know I want to complete weekly and if I don’t plan for them, like literally write them down in my planner AND on the calendar, I know I will miss it.
Whether it’s setting aside time to write an article, recording a new video series, hit the grocery store, pump (yes I’m still nursing), coordinate visits/play dates, update my website, do the laundry, correspond/meet with clients, ETC… it takes some SERIOUS and Intentional planning. And how I plan lines up with what I’ve prioritized! Yes, there are days when I just go with the flow, because that’s the only way to survive the day (😩😭😂), but I have a general plan for my week, in writing, to keep me on target!
I’m all about FLOW! And no, this isn’t a perfect situation. There have been times where I’ve planned things out to a T, and Dream just wasn’t on board. Take this post for example. I planned and set aside time to write, during Dream’s nap time. However, my teething 8-month old needed her mommy (poor thing)! And so here I am, typing while nursing! Anyone with kids will tell you, no two days are alike. So pray, plan and pivot as needed!
What are your weekly non-negotiables?
How can you plan ahead to account for those moments when your baby/babies aren’t in agreement?
“Planning ahead and taking action is a success strategy. Prayer and staying connected to THE Source is key”!
3. Check in, OFTEN!
Whether it’s communicating with your spouse, or checking in with yourself and reflecting on what is working… check in often! Celebrate your wins (no matter how small), and adjust as needed. For me I seriously had MORE time to work in my business when Dream was a little younger. I could put her in her bouncers/swing for self play and use those moments to get things done. But now… NOW that this little yummy nugget is mobile, and I barely have the time to even respond to an email. Why? Because I have to keep my eyes on her at ALL times 😭😭😭. With that, I had to do three things:
1. Check in with myself to determine what I needed to flourish in this season. I had to reassess my commitments how I plan to keep them.
2. Adjust my daily “routine” while I’m home alone with Dream to be in alignment with my current reality. She is sleeping much less during the day, so my availability and “free time” is no longer the same. I have to adjust accordingly.
3. Communicate with my hubby to figure out our schedules, to see how I could add in some productive/work time while he’s home. I also had to cut bak in other areas
Once I made the shift, harmony was not that far behind. I went from being overwhelmed and frustrated, feeling like I couldn’t get ANYTHING done… to discovering creative ways to pursue purpose! God is bomb like that. As you acknowledge HIM… He directs you’re every move! His is the MASTER CREATOR, and there is no part of your life that He can’t remedy!
-How have things changed for you over the past few months?
-How can you adjust to reignite the harmony in your life?
As things change around you, YOU MUST ADJUST. Check in often, acknowledge the change, seek God for wisdom and PIVOT!
Bonus: GET DRESSED!
I shower and get dressed every day. I have things in my wardrobe that are easy to throw on but are well coordinated to make me feel like somebody! Okay! I cannot stress the importance of showing up for yourself in this way. For me it’s an instant mood boost. Walking around in my robe all day vs. walking around in a jogger set or a cute pullover and some leggings. It makes a difference. Especially when I’m able to sit and work. I’m in a mental space to produce when I’m dressed.
-How can you show up for yourself with what you wear?
-What wardrobe adjustments can you make today?
“What you wear and how you show up for work is important… especially when you work for yourself”
It took me a little under a month to complete my vision board! Here’s why along with 3 takeaways that will help you SLAY your goals in 2020!
1￼. I had to be Intentional
One of the main themes in my life is to “Be Intentional”. My first attempt at a vision board years ago, didn’t go so well. I was a bit all over the place. I literally grabbed a couple of magazines, and started cutting and pasting pretty images with no real vision. To be honest, I was more concerned with making sure my board looked good, over making sure I picked images and words that were intentional and spoke directly to who God created me to be/what I wanted to manifest in my life. I know better now! I took the time to write out exactly what I was expecting God to do in my life, and this time around I found the images and words that aligned with this vision. Not only did I picked the bold, aesthetically appealing images, I chose them with purpose!
Takeaway: Write the vision, Make it plain… then find the images that are in alignment! Be intentional!
2. I wanted to make sure my goals were Actionable and Measurable.
Another things that was a complete shift this year, I made each goal actionable and measurable (Hello S.M.A.R.T planning). Where I once used to put everything on one big board, I actually used the last few pages of my 2020 planner*. I created what I am going to call vision pages! I broke down my vision for 2020 into 5 specific areas of my life; Faith, Family, Finances, Fitness and Business. And on each of those pages I focused on what I wanted to manifest! So my “Blog monthly” from 2019, turned into “Post 3x to blog monthly before the last day of that month”. And my very general “Workout” turned into the page you see in the featured image; complete with health and wellness goals and a mindset/affirmation to bring it all together. And Now when I check in at the end of each month, I’m very clear on where I hit the mark, and where I need to adjust!
Takeaway: Set actionable goals that you can measure! Check in monthly/quarterly, and adjust as needed!
3. I took the time to write out my Prayer requests in the form of praise reports!
This is not a new practice for me, but it is SOOOOO worth sharing! I am a writer (obvi) and for the past few years I’ve been very intentional about writing out specific prayer requests in the form of praise reports**! This started the year before I met my husband! I note this because in January of 2013 I wrote:
“Thank you, Lord for introducing me to my husband. I thank you for making me whole, and allowing me to experience real love from a man who loves and honors you”!
February 2013, I started dating Keem!
Now don’t get it twisted this is not a magical formula, nor is this a how to get a husband post. The key is how we frame our requests. If you look at what I wrote, I understood that I needed to be “whole” and complete in Him, before meeting the one! I took my eyes off of what I wanted and set my intention on what I needed… for God to work on me! Sometimes our prayers are so one sided, we forget to include the work we need to do! (Reference Psalm 37:4)
Framing our requests to God in the form of a declaration and praise is a game changer. Don’t get my wrong, there is totally a place for those broken moments when we lay it all at the feet of Jesus and know that only His strength can carry us. Listen, I have those meltdown moments in the presence of my Savior, too. (Oh, He is The Good Good Father and cares about EVERY SINGLE TEAR)! And I’m so thankful that He also responds to our faith as we declare His word over our lives, and shows Himself FAITHFUL every single time!
Takeaway: Fuel your prayers with faith. Give God praise in advance for what He is doing/going to manifest in your life, and watch God work out the details! Move as He directs! Delayed obedience could delay your promise!
*Shout out Patrice Washington, who inspired my idea when she mentioned her “Dream Journal”.
** Shout Out to my sister, Chris for this best practice!
Yes, you read that correctly! Check out my newest video to find out all the deets about my labor and delivery, along with lessons learned from my pregnancy journey! #NobodybutGod
Enjoy and be encouraged!
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Yaaaasssss! And our feature for the week, First Lady Tawana Washington, is taking it there! Married for 24 years, check out what she has to say about Communication, balance, and what it means to “wait on God”. You can connect with her via email: email@example.com
1. How many years have you been married,
and what has being married for xx years taught you?
After being married for 24 years, I have learned that communication is a key component in mymarriage. I have come to the realizationthat communication is not just talking, but theability tolisten towhat myspouse is saying. Many times we say “I hear you,”but the question isare youreally “listening”to what your spouse is saying. Listening issomething Iconsciously chooseto do. When I choose to listen to my spouse, I make a conscious effort to concentrate on what my spouse is saying, and to process the information. Communication is paramount in one’s marriage. The Word of God says:
“Let you speech be always with grace, seasoned withsalt, that ye may know how ye ought to answer every man.” –Col. 4:6
2. You are definitely a “woman of purpose” how have you navigated that space of being a help-mate for your husband, and a woman with a purpose/platform/ministry? What challenges have you had to overcome and how?
Balance is how Inavigatethis thing called life. Notonly am I a wife, butalso,a child of Godwith a divine purpose, a mother, a daughter, and a woman with a career. How does one handle such a great responsibility… it is called Balance. It is important tolearn how to balance all facets of your life. At any given point we are being called upon to satisfy or fulfill one of our roles. Balance is what is needed to maintainstability and, truth be told, oursanity.It is important to align one’s role with one’s responsibility and not allow your self to get lost in process. Again Balance is the key.
“A false balance is abomination to the Lord: but a justweight is his delight.” Proverbs11:1
3. What word of advice/wisdom do you have for the young wife who is struggling with “submission”?
Submission is the act of yielding oneself. God has given us (wives) the commandment to submit to our own husband.Ephesians 5:22-23… “Wives, submit yourselves unto you ownhusband, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife,even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the savior of thebody.” During present day, submissionisoften misunderstood and sometimescomes off as a negative act. We have to understand thatour submission is toGod first. Submissioncomes froma place of love, caringand trust.Inourobedienceand submissionunto God,we submit ourselves to our husband. We submit to our husbandbecause we love him, andareconfidentthat wecantrust him with ourheartinknowingthat he would not bring us harmwith hisword, actions or hisdeeds.
TheBiblealsosaysinEphesians 5: 21…“Submitting yourselves onetoanother in the fear of God.”
In a marriage, both the husband and the wife are called to submit.Christ issaying that the wife is willing to follow her husband’sleadership, andthehusband is to set aside his owninterest in order to care for his wife.I encouragethe wife to know that submission is honoring God. As we submit to Godwe become more willing to obey his command and submit to our husband.
4. What about the singles who want to be married, and feel like they’ve been waiting FOREVER? What does it truly mean to “wait on God” as a single woman waiting to be found? Is it just a cliche?
To wait on God, for a husband, is to trust God and understand that God knows what’s best for us. God knows what we need and when we need it. Waiting is the process of preparation. Preparation is the process of First, knowing who you are as an individual and knowing who you are in Christ. Secondly, knowing that you have worth and that you are worth waiting for. What God has for you is for you.
5. Anything else/advice/wisdom you feel led to share?
Marriage is a “Good Thang.” Like anything in life, marriage is work. You have to work at being communicative, understanding and forgiving. Marriage is ordained and sanctioned by God. Trust God, trust yourself and trust your spouse. “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.”(Philippians 4:13)
Yasssss to all of the above! Love what you’re reading! Be sure to comment below and let us know your thoughts! And be sure to connect with me on Instagram, @reese__dennis, for a more wisdom from the Fierce 5! Can’t wait to hear from you!