Image

The “Grace Plan” | What to do when you’re having a “mommy moment”😭

Listen, I know we love our children and we’re grateful for the opportunity to raise these amazing tiny humans… we all know mom life has its challenges. However, that doesn’t mean we have to sit in those moments. Nor does having a “bad moment” make you a bad mom! (Read that again)

So, let’s shift that internal narrative!

Are you with me? Okay, keep reading… this is good!

As we shift, I encourage you to create what I’m calling a “Grace Plan”. “What is that”, you ask? Simply put,  a “grace plan”  is a list of things to do when you need to give yourself grace! We often talk about “giving ourselves grace”, and  I decided to make it a little more practical for my life. 

Today, I’m sharing my “Grace Plan” with you. These are the 5 things that help me whenever I’m having one of those moments…. or days! It makes a world of difference when you don’t have to think on your feet,  because you have a preset plan of what to do. So I hope it will inspire you to create your own!  Remember, there is no right or wrong. This list is specific to your needs, and will totally vary depending on the season of your life, and age of your kiddos 😭😭😭. So apply what you love, leave what don’t, and create a plan that works for you! Let’s go!

1. Breathe Chi!

Literally stop, take a deep breath. Close out the apps, turn off the TV, or step into another space for a hot second. (I’ve done this several times in my pantry 😭😭😭). Close your eyes if you can, and BREATHE chi…. inhale and exhale!!! Such a simple practice,  but it’s such an amazing and powerful way to settle yourself in the moment.

2. Encourage yourself!

Once you’ve settled yourself, encourage yourself. Create some quick in the moment comebacks to speak over your life. Protip: prerecord yourself saying these in a voice memo so you can easily play them when you need to! A few things I say that are on my list:

“I am capable”
“I can do all things through Christ”
“It’s okay to stop and try again later”
“This moment is temporary”
“I’m having a moment, but I’m a great mom”
“LAWD, help me on TODAY”

That last one though 😭🙌🏾 I feel like I call on God all day. And you know what’s so bomb about that… He doesn’t mind. He actually wants us to rely on Him, and if I’m being honest He comes through for me every single time… even if it’s not the way I expected!

3. Create a playlist

When you don’t have the capacity to speak, it’s a great idea to have someone else help you with the “heavy lifting”. Better to have someone else speak life over you, than for you to allow those negative narratives to run wild internally! We’re done with that, remember?  I have a whole  playlist of worship songs to remind me of who I am and whose I am! It may take a few songs to get me together, but it works EVERY SINGLE TIME!

4. Change of scenery.

Strap the baby in the back and Go! Get out for a quick walk, a drive, walk the mailbox, sit on the deck… just get outside and change up the scenery. If your kids are older, go by yourself. Take some intentional deep breaths, and release the tension in your shoulders.  Idk what it is but the greenery and fresh air seem to  revive my soul and energize me to carry on!

5. Lean in to the moment.

Sometimes, those “mommy moments” require that we remain physically present,  meaning we can’t just shut things down and walk away.  In that case lean in and figure out what it is that you need to do for your little one in the moment. This may require that you reschedule a meeting, push back a play date, or delay your social post. It may require that you gracefully decline that clubhouse invite, or that phone call. And guess what? That is okay! Give yourself permission to lean in to those mommy moments when you need to, and give your littles what they need!  And as you lean in, observe, learn, be present… sometime you’ll find exactly what YOU need when you lean into those moments for your little ones!

Bonus Phone a friend!

There is so much power in community.! Having people you can call on not only to vent, but who will also build you back up, pray, laugh,  come over to help out, or send food when needed… is EVERYTHING! Having  people who are literally ready to do whatever you need to help you  so that you’re able to keep going… yea… we all need those people in our lives!

Momma, was this helpful? What will you add to you “Grace Plan”! Cant wait to hear what you come up with! Be sure to like and share with a friend in need!

XX

Image

Feeling overwhelmed at home all day with your toddler? Here are 7 things that will help you!

 

1. Start the day before your toddler wakes up.

As much as I enjoy “sleeping in” I know that I have to wake up first. My day is so much better when I do, even if it’s just for 15 mins to gather myself as I prepare for my day.  And I’m not always up “doing” something. Most mornings I’m up praying and just enjoying the moments of stillness before the crazy starts… it can get very “Wild Wild West-ish” over here real fast and those moments help me to “be ye ready” lol.

2. Create a mommy schedule. 

Having a mommy schedule has transformed my life! I’ve talked a great deal about my mom schedule (click here for the deets) and this has given my day  a sense of Rhythm. From when we wake up to when we go to sleep, for the past year I’ve been following a schedule with a set of routines that have helped me tremendously.  Trust me, knowing what comes next, creates flow… and you’ll find that you have more time now that you’ve been intentional about what you do with it!

3. Have a routine for those every day activities.

So let’s break this down real quick… Your schedule helps guide you to know what to do, the routine is how you do it. For example, I know that every night Dream needs to sleep, so we created a bed time  routine. Our routine is super simple… bath, moisturize hair, brush teeth, cuddles, turn on bed time music and we end in our rocking  chair til sis is knocked out. The routine doesn’t have to be extensive, it just needs to work for you and your family!

4. Get outside. 

I didn’t realize how much I came to rely on going out for my long 3 miles walks with Dream until this winter. It was rough. I was so used to being outside for the fresh air and the workout, and I not being able to get outside due to the weather… I didn’t  like it. Add that on top of the already restrictive access to so many places because of the pandemic… it was a lot. I knew that I needed to do something for my sanity! So I decided to do mommy and me drives. Most often I would set out to take a drive when I knew I had a  mobile pickup at Target or Wegmans! It was mostly for me, and it helped every time we took off! And on the days when I couldn’t go out for a full walk or drive, I’d often step outside for a few deep breaths. Everyday I make it a point to get outside…even if just for a few moments.  And now that the weather is warmer, and Dream is older we go out twice a day! Our community has a playground so in the mornings we walk for mommy, and after nap time we get outside for playtime!

5. Screen free activities!

Now don’t get me wrong we watch circle time and other educational shows… some days more than others because mommy needs her time… but admittedly I find that my day with Dream is so much better when I intentionally engage her with non-screen activities. So I went to Pinterest and found some pretty dope toddler activities!  We color, we read, we play games to review letters, numbers, shapes and colors, we play with building blocks, we dance, we sing… and so much more. Having a catalog  of activities to use throughout the day has been so good for us and the flow of our day! 

6 Reset the room.

Being home with a toddler can get messy! I remember one day it looked like a tornado flew through my house. Stuff was everywhere. And I said “well I have a toddler, so it just is what it is”. But I realized I was feeling this tightness in my chest every time I walked into those spaces… well because it was a mess!  That’s when it hit me,  this messy mom life ain’t for me if I can help it!  I want my house to be in order, as much as possible,  and I’ve been “resetting the room” ever since. Basically all you’re doing is cleaning as you go or putting things back in place once you’re done in that particular space in your home. It started with me cleaning and putting toys away, and now that Dream is older she’s been helping me out! I also have learned to layer my tasks… so while Dream is eating lunch I’ll reset the kitchen… or if we’re in her room, I’ll put things back in her closet… etc. You get the point. 

7. Make time for yourself EVERYDAY!

Finding a few moments just for me…everyday… has become nonnegotiable, and it is always what I need, when I need it! Making time for yourself doesn’t have to be anything major, You don’t even have to “do” anything… it may just be a moment to reflect, to sit, to rest. 

For me I’ve recently decided that at least 1 time every week I’m going to nap when Dream naps… and on the nights when hubby is on bed time duty I’ve scheduled “Reese time”. Yes, on my calendar! This week I’m giving myself a pedicure and I have my fave show to catch up on. Everyday in this season Dream takes a nap, so for  at least 15 mins of her nap hour I try to just reset, practice gratitude, stare at a wall, stare out the window… just intentional stillness.

Making time for yourself is a deeply personal and requires that yo be intentional Do whatever works for you but find a way to do it daily! 

xx

 

 

 

 

Love what you’re seeing?  Don’t want to miss any other posts or videos? Well, be sure to LIKE, COMMENT, SHARE and SUBSCRIBE!  And be sure to connect with me on Instagram @Reese__Dennis♥️♥️

Not for you? Share with a momma in need!

 

Image

3 Simple Ways to Survive Self Quarantine as a NEW MOM | #momlife

LAWD! Moms, Y’all good? During this whole COVID crisis, I’ve had so many emotions, and today I’m sharing 3 things that are helping me to survive self quarantine! Whether you’re a new mom, expecting mom or connected to a mom… this video is sure to be helpful!

Links mentioned:

9 completely Normal Things New Moms Experience

Why I Changed my eating lifestyle | Vegan + Allergen Free

Love what you’re seeing?  Don’t want to miss any other posts or videos? Well, be sure to LIKE, COMMENT, SHARE and SUBSCRIBE!  And be sure to connect with me on Instagram @Reese__Dennis♥️♥️

Image

Why It took Me a Month to Finish my “Vision Board ” + 3 Takeaways to Help You Slay in 2020!

It took me a little under a month to complete my vision board! Here’s why along with 3 takeaways that will help you SLAY your goals in 2020!

***

1. I had to be Intentional

One of the main themes in my life is to “Be Intentional”.  My first attempt at a vision board years ago, didn’t go so well.  I was a bit all over the place. I literally grabbed a couple of magazines, and started cutting and pasting pretty images with no real vision. To be honest,  I  was more concerned with making sure my board looked good, over making sure I picked images and words that were intentional and spoke directly to who God created me to be/what I wanted to manifest in my life.  I know better now! I took the time to write out exactly what I was expecting God to do in my life, and this time around I found the images and words that aligned with this vision. Not only did I picked the bold, aesthetically appealing images, I chose them with purpose! 

Takeaway: Write the vision, Make it plain… then find the images that are in alignment! Be intentional!

2. I wanted to make sure my goals were Actionable and Measurable.

Another things that was a complete shift this year, I made each goal actionable and measurable (Hello S.M.A.R.T planning). Where I once used to put everything on one big board, I actually used the last few pages of my 2020 planner*. I created what I am going to call vision pages! I broke down my vision for 2020 into 5 specific areas of my life; Faith, Family, Finances, Fitness and Business. And on each of those pages I focused on what I wanted to manifest!  So my “Blog monthly” from 2019, turned into “Post 3x to blog monthly before the last day of that month”. And my very general “Workout” turned into the page you see in the featured image; complete with health and wellness goals and a mindset/affirmation to bring it all together. And Now when I check in at the end of each month, I’m very clear on where I hit the mark, and where I need to adjust! 

Takeaway: Set actionable goals that you can measure! Check in monthly/quarterly, and adjust as needed!

3. I took the time to write out my Prayer requests in the form of praise reports!

This is not a new practice for me, but it is SOOOOO worth sharing! I am a writer (obvi) and for the past few years I’ve been very intentional about writing out specific prayer requests in the form of praise reports**! This started the year before I met my husband! I note this because in January of 2013 I wrote:

“Thank you, Lord for introducing me to my husband. I thank you for making me whole, and allowing me to experience real love from a man who loves and honors you”! 

February 2013, I started dating Keem! 

Now don’t get it twisted this is not a magical formula, nor is this a how to get a husband post. The key is how we frame our requests.  If you look at what I wrote, I understood that I needed to be “whole” and complete in Him, before meeting the one! I took my eyes off of what I wanted and set my intention on what I needed… for God to work on me! Sometimes our prayers are so one sided, we forget to include the work we need to do! (Reference Psalm 37:4)

Framing our requests to God in the form of a declaration and praise is a game changer. Don’t get my wrong, there is totally a place for those broken moments when we lay it all at the feet of Jesus and know that only His strength can carry us. Listen, I have those meltdown moments in the presence of my Savior, too. (Oh, He is The Good Good Father and cares about EVERY SINGLE TEAR)! And I’m so thankful that He also responds to our faith as we declare His word over our lives,  and shows Himself FAITHFUL every single time!

Takeaway: Fuel your prayers with faith. Give God praise in advance for what He is doing/going to manifest in your life, and watch God work out the details!  Move as He directs! Delayed obedience could delay your promise!

 

Reese

Credit:

*Shout out Patrice Washington, who inspired my idea when she mentioned her “Dream Journal”.

** Shout Out to my sister, Chris for this best practice!

 

Image

3 Timely Lessons From My First Postpartum Wardrobe Audit

A little over 7 months in and I did it! I kept my commitment to my “no excuses” weekly workout plan, and hosted my first wardrobe audit. Yaaasss!

I gave myself the time I needed and refused to stress myself out trying to become a member of the “I snapped back in 6 weeks” club.  No ma’am not me! I came to terms with this truth, well before Dream arrived and I’m so thankful! So 6ish months in, I finally ventured in for a wardrobe audit, trying on some of my most prized wardrobe pieces. Here are three lesson I learned through that process:

1. Give Yourself Grace.

I’m constantly reminded to give myself grace as I navigate #momlife, and I’ve been very intentional about giving myself that same level of grace in other areas of my life… especially with my body. Listen, being pregnant changed my body completely (😭😭😭) and I’m embracing the process as I “bounce-back”. Girl!!! It has taken me nearly 6 months just to get to a place where I am even comfortable facing my closet, and that is okay. This is a process, and I refuse to rush it or add unnecessary stress. The only person I’m graced to keep up with is MYSELF. And on this journey, grace really has my guiding light! Give Yourself Grace.

2. Things around you MUST shift as your life changes.

My social life has changed. The way in which I conduct business is shifting.  When and where I go and how I am able to show up is no longer the same… so my wardrobe must follow suit. I knew that some of those special pieces wouldn’t serve me the same way as they did before I had Dream, so I had to get really real about what I wanted to keep. Ironically, as my life has expanded, I’ve decided to embrace a more minimalistic lifestyle. This means that I can only embrace the things that can serve me right now.  Yes,  I kept a few date night and girls’ night out ensembles.  But As my life has become more “demanding” with a baby, I made it a point to keep the majority of my wardrobe chic & edgy, yet comfortable and quick. Now don’t get it twisted, I am and always will be #SnatchedforHisglory! I Just had to pivot a bit. The idea is “grab and go”, while still being fabulous! Things around you must shift as your life changes!

3. If it doesn’t serve you, Let it go!

This goes beyond holding onto things that no longer fit. This is more so about holding on to things that no longer serve me. This is about that dress I wore when I went in for my first interview (that I haven’t touched in 2 years), and that gorgeous gown I wore for my baby shower (yes just a matter of months ago).  Those garments were seasonal and I need to thank them for what they did for me and release! Yes, they bring me joy when I remember when I wore them, but when I think of how to incorporate them into my wardrobe NOW… it’s a bit overwhelming. Almost like mental clutter, SERIOUSLY!!  They could easily be passed on to someone else for enjoyment! I know for some of us the mindset is “it’s in great condition”, or “I only wore it once”, but the real question is how will it serve you now? And if it’s causing mental clutter trying to sort it all out, release it!  If it doesn’t serve you, let it go!

Reese