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The “Grace Plan” | What to do when you’re having a “mommy moment”😭

Listen, I know we love our children and we’re grateful for the opportunity to raise these amazing tiny humans… we all know mom life has its challenges. However, that doesn’t mean we have to sit in those moments. Nor does having a “bad moment” make you a bad mom! (Read that again)

So, let’s shift that internal narrative!

Are you with me? Okay, keep reading… this is good!

As we shift, I encourage you to create what I’m calling a “Grace Plan”. “What is that”, you ask? Simply put,  a “grace plan”  is a list of things to do when you need to give yourself grace! We often talk about “giving ourselves grace”, and  I decided to make it a little more practical for my life. 

Today, I’m sharing my “Grace Plan” with you. These are the 5 things that help me whenever I’m having one of those moments…. or days! It makes a world of difference when you don’t have to think on your feet,  because you have a preset plan of what to do. So I hope it will inspire you to create your own!  Remember, there is no right or wrong. This list is specific to your needs, and will totally vary depending on the season of your life, and age of your kiddos 😭😭😭. So apply what you love, leave what don’t, and create a plan that works for you! Let’s go!

1. Breathe Chi!

Literally stop, take a deep breath. Close out the apps, turn off the TV, or step into another space for a hot second. (I’ve done this several times in my pantry 😭😭😭). Close your eyes if you can, and BREATHE chi…. inhale and exhale!!! Such a simple practice,  but it’s such an amazing and powerful way to settle yourself in the moment.

2. Encourage yourself!

Once you’ve settled yourself, encourage yourself. Create some quick in the moment comebacks to speak over your life. Protip: prerecord yourself saying these in a voice memo so you can easily play them when you need to! A few things I say that are on my list:

“I am capable”
“I can do all things through Christ”
“It’s okay to stop and try again later”
“This moment is temporary”
“I’m having a moment, but I’m a great mom”
“LAWD, help me on TODAY”

That last one though 😭🙌🏾 I feel like I call on God all day. And you know what’s so bomb about that… He doesn’t mind. He actually wants us to rely on Him, and if I’m being honest He comes through for me every single time… even if it’s not the way I expected!

3. Create a playlist

When you don’t have the capacity to speak, it’s a great idea to have someone else help you with the “heavy lifting”. Better to have someone else speak life over you, than for you to allow those negative narratives to run wild internally! We’re done with that, remember?  I have a whole  playlist of worship songs to remind me of who I am and whose I am! It may take a few songs to get me together, but it works EVERY SINGLE TIME!

4. Change of scenery.

Strap the baby in the back and Go! Get out for a quick walk, a drive, walk the mailbox, sit on the deck… just get outside and change up the scenery. If your kids are older, go by yourself. Take some intentional deep breaths, and release the tension in your shoulders.  Idk what it is but the greenery and fresh air seem to  revive my soul and energize me to carry on!

5. Lean in to the moment.

Sometimes, those “mommy moments” require that we remain physically present,  meaning we can’t just shut things down and walk away.  In that case lean in and figure out what it is that you need to do for your little one in the moment. This may require that you reschedule a meeting, push back a play date, or delay your social post. It may require that you gracefully decline that clubhouse invite, or that phone call. And guess what? That is okay! Give yourself permission to lean in to those mommy moments when you need to, and give your littles what they need!  And as you lean in, observe, learn, be present… sometime you’ll find exactly what YOU need when you lean into those moments for your little ones!

Bonus Phone a friend!

There is so much power in community.! Having people you can call on not only to vent, but who will also build you back up, pray, laugh,  come over to help out, or send food when needed… is EVERYTHING! Having  people who are literally ready to do whatever you need to help you  so that you’re able to keep going… yea… we all need those people in our lives!

Momma, was this helpful? What will you add to you “Grace Plan”! Cant wait to hear what you come up with! Be sure to like and share with a friend in need!

XX

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I’m Organizing my Home, Here’s What I’ve learned so far #momlife

That before was taken right at the moment when I said to myself “why am I living like this, enough is enough” and I didn’t even capture the dining table bc I was so embarrassed. It was covered with mail, toys, old containers &  dishes😩😭😩

You see I kept hearing & seeing  a lot of things about momlife, and how mess and clutter are inevitable when you have kids. But it’s so wild  because for me, I was using the “I have a kid” narrative to cover up a problem I’ve had for years with clutter😭😭😭

To be honest, I’d also convinced myself that “my mess wasn’t that bad” because I was comparing it to what others had… and their mess was way worse… smh!!! Just awful! I Told y’all comparison will keep you all the way stuck in your mess! Figuratively and LITERALLY!

Well A few months ago (after immersing myself into the world organizing), I decided to change that narrative in my life. I wanted to become a woman of order especially in my home. And although kids can add a whole lot of “messy” to your life & home… I  decided I no longer  wanted to live in that mess as my norm.

So I’ve been on a journey of creating a lifestyle  where everything in my home has a place (ORDER), and I set a few moments daily to maintain my space (FLOW). 

It’s funny bc all of this started when I took those first small steps (for example making my bed daily). And once I started with those simple daily habit, it’s like the energy to continue was overflowing from within me! I’ve tried to organize before, and fell short every single time! I realized this happened because I was only focused on the task. Once I decided to make this a lifestyle, and focus on who I want to BECOME in the process, the shift happened… and here we are! And I’m just getting started 🙌🏾

I’m no expert or guru in the art of decluttering or organizing… but what I do know is that your life will seldom change if you only focus on the tasks. 

I encourage you to decide who you want to become, and create goals that are in alignment with that as you TAKE ACTION.  Start as small as you need to. Be intentional and watch the energy that you need to carry on kick in and overtake you!  This is not a competition, but rather an amazing opportunity for you to create the life you’ve always desired for yourself. A life of becoming all that you know you’re called to be, filled with the overflow and results you crave the most! 

The choice is yours!

xx

Reese

 

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I’m Starting to LOVE Being a Mom | Video + 3 things that helped me!

👇🏾Watch this👇🏾

1. Giving myself permission to “be” & set my own expectations! 

Knowing that who I am is enough, and embracing what that looks like in each area of my life has been life changing… especially as a mom.  I’ve had to seriously let go of chasing results just to validate myself in the eyes of others (this was huge for me this year). You see before I let go of all the pressure I was putting on myself to perform, I wasn’t embracing the now.  Sometimes, we get so caught up focusing on “becoming” that we don’t allow ourselves to enjoy actually being.  And that, momma,  will always rob you of the beauty of the present.

All of you is worthy and all of your journey is important.

 I truly believe  most of the angst and overwhelm we feel as moms come from trying to live up to someone else’s expectations. We put so much pressure on ourselves. We take all that we see in our community, hear from others, and consume in the media, and allow it to dictate what our lives “should” look like. And what’s wild is that we do all of this without even stopping to ask “is this really the life I want for myself”. Let’s change that.

The life you love is wait for you on the other side of  giving  yourself permission!

2. Embracing gratitude and grace!

I can’t explain it, but as I’ve been  spending time thanking God for my life and being specific and intentional about all that I’m grateful for, it feels like I have a new set of eyes. Like, I used to see my mommy challenges as insurmountable obstacles… like a legit  set up  (😭😭😭).  I now see them as opportunities for God’s grace to overflow, and for Him to help me to grow through it (So I guess it was a set up for God to show up🤭🙌🏾).  Being a mom Is not easy, but shifting my focus from the storm, to The Strong Tower… has made a huge difference in my life! I even look at my husband differently, but that’s a whole other topic for another post.

 Spending time in gratitude has also helped me to recognize, amplify, and enjoy the little things that add so much to my life, especially those moments I spend with my little lady. I laugh so much more,  I’m learning not to sweat the small stuff, and God’s grace looks amazing on me as I grow through my journey!

3 Acknowledging that I’m living the life that I prayed for!

At the beginning of every year, I have this practice of writing out my prayer requests and my vision for the year in the form of praise reports (Thanks to my sister Chris for the Inspo). Basically calling things that are not as though they are. (This is an excellent practice that I’ve helped guide my moms through. It’s been so rewarding, and many have already experienced the life they’ve been praying for, and the year ain’t even over yet!! I’m talking pregnancies, elevation in their businesses… time and intimacy with their spouses… it’s lit in our community)

Well don’t you know I was recently reminded of one of my “praise reports”, from a few years ago!  Here’s what it said:

Thank you Father, for the opportunity to stay at home and raise my family. Thank you that I’m not pressured to work, but my husband and I are stewarding our increase, and are in the position for me to stay home.

Like, do y’all see this! Chills!

 Not gonna lie, after becoming an entrepreneur, I wasn’t always this excited about being at home with my little one.  I told y’all I was wrapped up, tied up… tangled up in that pressure to perform; chasing the success that I thought would gain me the approval of others.  But now… now that I’ve fixed my eyes on God’s faithfulness to me… I can now see and live in the blessing that is my life!

Prayer

Thank you Father, for showing me new ways to enjoy being a mom.  I love my children, and I am learning to love MY mommy journey. I give myself permission to let go of what doesn’t belong, and will replace it with gratitude as Your grace covers me. I’m grateful for the opportunity to be a mommy, and I know that You will continue to guide me and show up for me, as I continue to acknowledge you in all of my ways. Through trials, triumphs and as I build my testimony… the process doesn’t have to overwhelm me! I am fully persuaded that I am called and equipped to be a great mom; as I  create and live an exciting and fulfilling life. In Jesus’ Name, Amen!

Be Encouraged, momma!

Xx,

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Struggling with selfcare, momma? Get inspired with this list | 7 Thing I do weekly just for me!

If you’re a mom then you know creating time and space for yourself isn’t always the easiest. With all th things we have to manage throughout the day, more often than not we put ourselves last. One thing I’ve learned in my motherhood journey is that I am at my best, when I make the time for myself, and do the things that I love to do just for me!  Even if it’s just for a few moments, I am so much more present, grounded and just ready to face what comes my way when my cup is filled!

So, if you’ve been struggling to find the time for yourself, check out my list of the 7 things I do every week just for me, that keep me at my best!

1 Workout. 

Every week I workout. The benefits of working out, especially as a mom are unmatched! From a 3 mile walk, to a 20 minute HIT workout… I’ve committed to myself (and my accountability partner) that I will workout a minimum of 3 times a week, and its been everything I’ve needed. There have even been days when things just felt off, and  I set up shop for a quick 15 min HIT and it got me all the way together. My workouts are strategic and concise, and most often take place while Dream is right there, and it still counts as time just for me! I will always find time to maintain my snatch!

2. “Read”

Every week I’ve committed to reading a few pages a day.  My 2021 goal is to read 1 book every month, and I’m already 7 books in and we’re just getting to May.  Now this may be misleading because sitting down with a physical book doesn’t work for me, In this season of mommyhood. The secret?  I listen to my books and I’ve become well acquainted with Audible and Libby.   Yaaassss!  And let me spill this tea real quick…  these earbuds have changed the game, and only cost $20! Seriously, I love that I can turn on my app, put in my wireless earbuds, and listen discreetly while Dream is playing or while we’re on our walks and drives! If you haven’t switched to audio books, I Highly recommend that you consider!

3. Show up and Slay

If you follow me on social media you know I love to slay! I absolutely love to get dressed, I love makeup, and I love to look as good as I feel! So at least once EVERY week, I plan a whole look… sometimes I do it daily, depending on our schedule. I get dressed up, beat my face (sometime full glam), and I live my best snatched mommy life in the playroom with Dream. lol. Most times I have nowhere to go, and I do it just for me, because it makes me feel amazing! I no longer wait for an invite, or for the perfect moment to show up and slay. I create those moments for myself, and it’s been crazy fun.  Even on the days when I don’t feel my best, getting dressed is such mood and confidence boost! So weekly, this momma is going to show up and OWN it.

4. Create

I love to create content. So every week, I take the ideas I’ve gathered and batch create my  content. Video is my jam, I even created a whole Video Bootcamp to help women show up and slay using the power of video to build their own platforms! It’s been amazing. And for me, creating gives me so much life!  It’s an outlet, but it also fuels me. From creating videos for IG, blogging, creating courses and ebooks, and even just sharing my mommy journey….whether for 30 mins or 3 hours… I get so excited when I make the time and space to just sit and flex my creative muscle.

5. Uninterrupted Showers

Yes, I do shower everyday. I also  know some have said “this is basic maintenance”, but for me… enjoying an uninterrupted  shower and just getting lost in thought is soooo good for my mental! Most times my showers are super quick and efficient because I have Dream. But when hubby is here to take over, I’ve committed to enjoying a longer than usual shower at least once a week. For some this may look like a bubble bath. But seriously, I cry, I pray, I get ideas, and sometimes I just sit in stillness with worship on in the background. And every time I get to enjoy a shower like this, it  gives me the boost I need to continue to thrive as a whole mom!

6. Rest

I’ve never been one to sleep when baby sleeps because I usually have other things to tend to during those precious moments of freedom, lol… but thanks to my mommy schedule and the flow it has created for my life, I’ve been able to created space and time for myself to rest. I’ve committed to sit and pause once a week when Dream naps. I’m not always sleeping, but I told myself that I will sit in stillness, and rest for those 60-90 minutes while Dream sleeps. Ooooh, but when I do drift off into slumberland, it’s always blessed and anointed! lol!

7. Wine down

When hubby is on bedtime duty, momma is enjoy a glass of wine and relaxation. No work, no laundry… just a moment to breathe and release the day.  Some days “relaxation” is sitting on my comfy living room couch, staring out the window. Other days I’m on my deck letting the breeze grace my face.  And some evenings I’m curled up in the basement watching my fave episodes of Frasier.   No matter what, it’s always just what I need when I need it!

Momma what’s on your weekly  list? What are you doing just for you to keep your cup filled? How will you make time for yourself this week?  Comment below, or share on social!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Love what you’re seeing?  Don’t want to miss any other posts or videos? Well, be sure to LIKE, COMMENT, SHARE and SUBSCRIBE!  And be sure to connect with me on Instagram @Reese__Dennis♥️♥️

Not for you? Share with a momma in need!

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Feeling overwhelmed at home all day with your toddler? Here are 7 things that will help you!

 

1. Start the day before your toddler wakes up.

As much as I enjoy “sleeping in” I know that I have to wake up first. My day is so much better when I do, even if it’s just for 15 mins to gather myself as I prepare for my day.  And I’m not always up “doing” something. Most mornings I’m up praying and just enjoying the moments of stillness before the crazy starts… it can get very “Wild Wild West-ish” over here real fast and those moments help me to “be ye ready” lol.

2. Create a mommy schedule. 

Having a mommy schedule has transformed my life! I’ve talked a great deal about my mom schedule (click here for the deets) and this has given my day  a sense of Rhythm. From when we wake up to when we go to sleep, for the past year I’ve been following a schedule with a set of routines that have helped me tremendously.  Trust me, knowing what comes next, creates flow… and you’ll find that you have more time now that you’ve been intentional about what you do with it!

3. Have a routine for those every day activities.

So let’s break this down real quick… Your schedule helps guide you to know what to do, the routine is how you do it. For example, I know that every night Dream needs to sleep, so we created a bed time  routine. Our routine is super simple… bath, moisturize hair, brush teeth, cuddles, turn on bed time music and we end in our rocking  chair til sis is knocked out. The routine doesn’t have to be extensive, it just needs to work for you and your family!

4. Get outside. 

I didn’t realize how much I came to rely on going out for my long 3 miles walks with Dream until this winter. It was rough. I was so used to being outside for the fresh air and the workout, and I not being able to get outside due to the weather… I didn’t  like it. Add that on top of the already restrictive access to so many places because of the pandemic… it was a lot. I knew that I needed to do something for my sanity! So I decided to do mommy and me drives. Most often I would set out to take a drive when I knew I had a  mobile pickup at Target or Wegmans! It was mostly for me, and it helped every time we took off! And on the days when I couldn’t go out for a full walk or drive, I’d often step outside for a few deep breaths. Everyday I make it a point to get outside…even if just for a few moments.  And now that the weather is warmer, and Dream is older we go out twice a day! Our community has a playground so in the mornings we walk for mommy, and after nap time we get outside for playtime!

5. Screen free activities!

Now don’t get me wrong we watch circle time and other educational shows… some days more than others because mommy needs her time… but admittedly I find that my day with Dream is so much better when I intentionally engage her with non-screen activities. So I went to Pinterest and found some pretty dope toddler activities!  We color, we read, we play games to review letters, numbers, shapes and colors, we play with building blocks, we dance, we sing… and so much more. Having a catalog  of activities to use throughout the day has been so good for us and the flow of our day! 

6 Reset the room.

Being home with a toddler can get messy! I remember one day it looked like a tornado flew through my house. Stuff was everywhere. And I said “well I have a toddler, so it just is what it is”. But I realized I was feeling this tightness in my chest every time I walked into those spaces… well because it was a mess!  That’s when it hit me,  this messy mom life ain’t for me if I can help it!  I want my house to be in order, as much as possible,  and I’ve been “resetting the room” ever since. Basically all you’re doing is cleaning as you go or putting things back in place once you’re done in that particular space in your home. It started with me cleaning and putting toys away, and now that Dream is older she’s been helping me out! I also have learned to layer my tasks… so while Dream is eating lunch I’ll reset the kitchen… or if we’re in her room, I’ll put things back in her closet… etc. You get the point. 

7. Make time for yourself EVERYDAY!

Finding a few moments just for me…everyday… has become nonnegotiable, and it is always what I need, when I need it! Making time for yourself doesn’t have to be anything major, You don’t even have to “do” anything… it may just be a moment to reflect, to sit, to rest. 

For me I’ve recently decided that at least 1 time every week I’m going to nap when Dream naps… and on the nights when hubby is on bed time duty I’ve scheduled “Reese time”. Yes, on my calendar! This week I’m giving myself a pedicure and I have my fave show to catch up on. Everyday in this season Dream takes a nap, so for  at least 15 mins of her nap hour I try to just reset, practice gratitude, stare at a wall, stare out the window… just intentional stillness.

Making time for yourself is a deeply personal and requires that yo be intentional Do whatever works for you but find a way to do it daily! 

xx

 

 

 

 

Love what you’re seeing?  Don’t want to miss any other posts or videos? Well, be sure to LIKE, COMMENT, SHARE and SUBSCRIBE!  And be sure to connect with me on Instagram @Reese__Dennis♥️♥️

Not for you? Share with a momma in need!

 

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Create the Life that Excites You!

I’m a whole mom and I’m creating a life that excites me…

From how I show up and slay (imma be that snatched mom 💋💁🏾‍♀️)… to the time I spend with my family, my child my spouse…. to the way I create 🤩… even how I have to shift as the seasons of my motherhood journey change (learning from the different circumstances I face🙌🏾😭)… I’m create the life I desire through it all🙌🏾🙌🏾

Periodt.

Idk who needs to be reminded, but Moms can absolutely SLAY and experience amazing, fulfilling, purposefully abundant lives…

and we don’t have to wait until our kids are grown.

Idk about you but I’m doing just that! Creating a life worth bragging about… not bc of me… but to be a living witness of just how dope God is and what He can do in and through me as I surrender to Him and stay in alignment… yes… as a WHOLE mom!

How about you, momma? What are you willing to do to experience the life you desire? Are you courageous enough to say “YES” to you?

“Never doubt God’s mighty power to work in you and accomplish all this. He will achieve infinitely more than your greatest request, your most unbelievable dream, and exceed your wildest imagination! He will outdo them all, for his miraculous power constantly energizes you.” Ephesians‬ ‭3:20‬ ‭TPT‬‬

Xx
Reese